school starts today

aka im the one elected to drive all my friends to school and its my duty to make sure theyre all awake and im probably awake much earlier than i need to be and i need to look all cute so people wanna be my friend

wish me luck!

football sunday- lets go giants!

last night was fun, the boy and i went out with my dad and his friends to a hockey game then dinner. all i ate was salad and a few garlic shrimps and pieces of octopus. theyve got the BEST salad. id say 95% of my calorie intake was wine lol. it was a lot of fun :) we left early too so i didnt have to deal with dessert!

now its football sunday of course, watching the ravens and pats right now. my dads gf should be home soon, she thought she was "doing something nice" by buying all these "fun things to eat"

who the fuck eats lasanga? i dont wanna fucking eat lasagna? ugh, cant wait to hear her bitch and moan and force feed me -.-

i hope everyones had a good weekend :)!! school starts for me tomorrow guuuh. hopefully that means a fast! 

really wanna fast today

think i justttt might be able too, since i woke up so late. i hope my friend doesnt want to go out to dinner when shes out of work. ill def be going to the gym today too. i dont know if ill go as hard with the running like i did the other day, but i plan on just at least watching the tv with my headphones in and walking till i cant stand to anymore. 

i need to get peppy again, last night was rough. the squadron that replaced my ex-fiance in afghanistan had a fatal crash yesterday.. this is the second CH53D crash he's managed to miss in less than a year... all of his buddies were on that helicopter, and 6 of them have been pronounced dead and of course the names havent been released yet.. even i knew some of them, and their wives. i stayed up till 4 AM talking to him trying to calm him down and brighten him up but all i could do was cry. 

people dont understand how real the war is until you experience its affects first hand... so im telling all of you, please be thankful for everyday you have, the luckiest you can be is to wake up to another beautiful day. its true when they say these young men and women are over there fighting for your country literally 24/7.. and they dont all come back. i dont know what i would do if jordan didnt come back in september..

still on pins and needles wanting to know the names, but i cant let this control my day. its friday, im off for the weekend, im seeing the boy tonight, gotta get my game face on. i wish i had the energy i did yesterday :|

DAY 3 SOBER ! feeling wonderful

woke up feeling goood.. good because i feel thin and GREAT because ive been sober the last 2 nights. if i can seriousy keep it up all today/tonight this will be

the longest ive been sober in 2 years. sad but true.

and i think i can do it!

so yeah.. im feeling a fast today. maybe. its only 11 and im hungry, but im gonna clean the entire upstairs instead. and im wearing a tight tank top so i wont want to eat. 

post later! time to clean :) stay strong babyycakes

 ~edit~

my room is SO nice and clean. washed the floor, washed the sheets, threw out old perfume/lotion/makeup/hairstuff, finally moved all my crap into my real room and made it look nice, cleaned out the other room- i feel good! and i sent out my jewelry to my tumblr friends and dropped off clothes to the bin. now im enjoying some music and drinking green tea before work 

intake;;

++  6 forkfuls of my tuna salad

dinner tonight for work? dont know yet

^^ UGH love that one

day 1- SUCCESS! day 2- LETS GO!

yesterday was great, i did the 7 and a half miles at the gym burned all those calories and only had 3 tiny tuna lettuce wraps that i brought to work AND i didnt drink when i got home... which is ... that never happens hahah. so im one day sober!

my tuna salad is AWESOME my the way. i just use regular white albacore tuna in water, than instead of nasty fucking mayo i use THIS mayo

only ten calories per table spoon. so for the WHOLE big ass batch i make i use only 3 table spoons, and lots of lemon juice. then chop up carrots, red cabbage, and celery to make it nice and hearty, then season to taste with salt and pepper and there ya go! i can live off the whole batch for like a week.

~today~

its 2 o clock right now, havent eaten anything yet. didnt go to the gym, though. im really sore and had to wake up early and took too long of a nap after. but yeah, just water and green tea. bought a new straightener, went to the doctors, and now the boys about to stop over before im off to work so he can pick up his charger :)

dont think ill eat before work... probably just pack my tuna lettuce wraps again for work. and im really gonna try to stay sober again tonight! I HAVENT BEEN SOBER FOR TWO DAYS STRAIGHT IN.... EASILY A YEAR. seriously, im REALLY hoping cutting down my alcohol will let me loose some easy pounds. praying.

AND YAY FOR ACTUALLY POSTING AGAIN LIKE I SAID I WOULD!